Children and Divorce
Separation and divorce are increasingly frequent in our society and children are left needing to adjust to the new reality between their parents. Research shows that although many children find the adjustment difficult at first not all children suffer long term effects.
In this chapter Dr. Smyth describes the typical reactions to separation by children of various ages and she offers advice on how parents can minimize the negative effects of separation for children of different age groups. As well, Dr. Smyth describes the types of professional services available to families, and how to access them.
Dr. Smyth shows that families can learn to cope with the inevitable stresses and strains as everyone tries to move forward and do the best they can in creating a new beginning and a new family arrangement.
Be it infants and toddlers, preschoolers, early elementary school aged children, older elementary school aged children, or adolescents, Dr. Smyth speaks to it all and in an informed and detailed a fashion. As well, she identifies what you can expect when you meet with the therapist/counsellor and the variety of approaches that the professional may use.
Helping Children Cope With Separation and Divorce
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Child Counselling Ottawa
Mental health professionals can be helpful to families experiencing separation and divorce in different ways. If your child has not been showing symptoms of distress at the point of parental separation, but you anticipate that your child will be undergoing significant, stressful changes, you may wish to take advantage of mental health services which are preventative in nature.Preventative intervention is usually offered through time-limited group experiences. The prevalence of separation in recent years has led to the development of group programs for children of different age groups. These programs are educative and supportive in nature. Generally, each meeting involves discussion of one of the issues confronting children whose parents separate (i.e. coping with parental conflict, dealing with visits to non-custodial parents, meeting step-parents etc.). The group format is useful in helping children to recognize that other children have faced the same difficulties and have learned to manage these problems. Consultation is often offered in-group sessions to the parents of children involved in these groups.
If, however, your child or adolescent is experiencing significant problems, as indicated by concerns about their ability to function academically or socially in school, or severe conflicts with family members, involvement with a mental health professional on an individual basis is indicated.
How to Access Professional Help
The groups, which offer preventative intervention, are found in community mental health centres and other social agencies. In some instances they are offered through the psychology or social work departments of school boards and are held in schools.
Individual help can be accessed through community mental health centres, children's outpatient clinics in hospitals and through state or provincial professional associations, which provide referrals to private practitioners in psychiatry, psychology or social work. If you have an employee assistance program in your work place, you may be able to obtain an appropriate referral through an EAP counsellor. In some instances, a referral
from your family doctor may be necessary to be seen in a hospital setting, or by a psychiatrist.
You can request services yourself from a psychologist or social worker in private practice. Payment is required when psychologists or social workers are seen in private practice settings. However, some health insurance plans offer reimbursement for some of the costs of this service.
Read more about the author of this chapter, Dr. Frances Smyth.